Updated: Jul 16
Are you looking for love?
Is your heart a yearning?
Does anyone have the answers?
You ever watch a YouTuber personality who claims
they found "THE SECRET" to finding your soul mate?
Well, I'm here to tell you.
They actually found the secret to love.
I bought their books,
I paid for their video classes,
I signed up for their programs,
I spent my entire life savings
on their seminars.
4 YEARS LATER, I have finally bought their secrets to love, and I'm here to give them to you.
Love App Culture
Download all the love apps.
This tactic works.
The app industry has made the process extremely accessible. Type the word dating into your phone or your computer and sign up.
Based on years of interactions with friends and strangers from every spectrum, gender, and race, it seems as though everyone generally hates the apps. Yet, people admit that they work. They link up. They chat. Sometimes these interactions lead to meet-ups. Sometimes this leads to love, marriage, and children.
Within 5 minutes and you can start searching for your future love.
Your first photo should be of you BY YOURSELF. Never in a group.
Write a short sentence with vague 4(max) details about yourself.
Add 3-4 more photos. Don't go overboard. Less can be more.
Then start swiping.
There are Good and Bad side effects of using dating apps:
Despite all of these feelings and thoughts, get yourself out there and try!
Download them all. Or at least one.
You won't regret it.
A NIGHT ON THE TOWN
Are Funky Fresh Foxes Feeling Friendly on Fridays?
Apps not for you? Totally fine. Get your ass up and get that ass out on the town. Go out. Talk to anyone who will smile back at you. Some people are rude and judgmental but remember...
"You're a catch"
"You have so much to offer"
"If we were all the same, it would be a boring world."
"They are out there."
"You could meet the love of your life at the grocery store"
"You just gotta try. It will happen."
Whether you think it or not, love is out there. It isn't going to knock on your door, so you need to be proactive.
Before I became the inspiration for the 2008 movie Love Guru.
I rarely took showers during the weekends.
I had horrible hair.
I ate bad foods.
A pretty-eyed girl POPPED UP on my YouTube. She told me she knew exactly what I should and shouldn't do to attract "the person of my dreams". Well, turns out, she did know. I consumed every last drop of her content. Then another lady told me how to dress. Then a handsome dude told me how to do my hair. Then another guy told me how to change my body. They captivated me with their photos, articles, and videos. I subscribed to their pages, got way too deep in the comment sections, and eventually sent all of my money to a family in Peru and have donated a kidney to an old man in Utah.
All in the name of love!
It is easy to scoff at watching Youtube videos for advice. But there is something to be said about taking the first steps. You may not be ready to meet people in the flesh and have random conversations. You might not be ready for the apps. But anyone can click and watch at least one video. If you are thinking about dating, are thinking about the idea of love, or are just curious about the idea of affection, watch one video. Then watch another. The process of falling in love starts with thinking about love. This is a game of baby steps and preparing yourself for your person.
I found the key to love, and I want to give it to you!
If you decide to surround yourself with love, then start consuming internet love videos for hours on end. Download the apps. Get out there and get fishing. Apparently, the sea is big and deep and there are plenty of fish waiting around to be caught in your net.
First, you might have to change everything about yourself. Or perhaps stay exactly as you are.
Take my Test to find out if you're ready for love and then subscribe to My Love Program 39.99/month. I will give you all of my pdfs, docs, spreadsheets, and my new limited edition 8 series DVD disc set. This mountain of data and information will not serve you wrong.
Click here now!
This Love Program is not for the faint of heart.
If you made it this far... MERP DERP!
What is the internet?
I don't know.
But I created, and I shared.
Thus, I have contributed?