Updated: Jul 16
You want to write about guns eh? Don't Shoot Your Eye Out.
This topic isn't new and Guns are a global...
F+G. One of the worst parts about the g-word, is actually talking about the g-word. Writing about g-word is a feat. Hell, joking about g-word is a triumph. That's why I take this so g-word seriously.
List of Guns I Currently Own
It is hard to know how many guns are truly anywhere at any time. The world is littered with guns.
The world has guns like some teenagers have acne.
The gun industry makes huge amounts of money around this globe.
Mucho denaros et countries.
Guns have existed for a long long time. Like many inventions throughout history, it seems like guns will forever exist. It doesn't seem like we can go back...? And if that is true, shouldn't we learn how to live with/amongst them. Some people own many. Yet,
of humans do not own a gun. I like to think that this is a positive thing. If we were all the same it would be a boring world.
Not To Gun
That is A question, of many questions. If you search guns on the internet, you will be blasted with so much information that it feels like the world stops spinning. Endless gun content. About 1,450,000,000 results (0.76 seconds) I want to say this is too many. But who am I judge? Feel free to google rocks; there are even more results. Do we really need this much content about rocks? I digress.
Are you gonna shoot your eye out?
The only gun I want, is my mental gun.
What am I aiming at? What is my next target? Right now, it's stealing your attention for my own financial gain. When life gives you guns, you start an online business. Hopefully, it turns into a pyramid scheme and you never get caught. Look at you now, you're in Kokomo.
I am happy to say that I live in a place where I can safely walk out of my barber's shop and not witness a dual in the middle of the street. No Thank You. The 17-1800's were gross!
Enemy UAVs online!
This is the 21st century, why aren't flamethrowers available at CVS?
Despite Clint Eastwood's daunting glare, Neo's limbo record, and Django saying "I count two guns" I am generally uninterested in the act of owning. That is my choice for now. At the same time, other people are all jazzed up about their guns and their gadgets. That is also totally fine.
I want dual Snake Skin Engraved Holsters bedazzle in sapphires.
Sometimes life is like hard-hitting recoil.
Got butterflies in your stomach?
Did you just see the person of your dreams?
They're already married.
Do you think you just landed that dream job?
"We are uninterested and considering other candidates."
Excited to watch cartoons with a bowl of cereal?
There is no almond milk.
Do you really think I'm gonna drink that 2% swill like a west-side shoe peddler?
"Never forget your earplugs ya dingus."
Always check the chamber.
Safety on or off?
"I heard he is a Pistol Packing Pete."
"Well, I heard he is shooting blanks."
Love Gun Anyone?
Driving by laser tag makes me drool.
Kiss of Death
My opinion of guns is like my opinion of shepherd's pie. Don't go putting any corn in it.
If you made it this far... MERP DERP!
What is the internet?
I don't know.
But I created, and I shared.
Thus, I have contributed?